Dear Coquette,

After a year and a half, I finally realized why my roommate’s boyfriend bugs me: He’s boring. He’s a perfectly nice, perfectly attractive, perfectly successful functioning adult, but he has nothing terribly interesting to say, or at least not to me. Then, when my roommate is together with her boyfriend, she feeds off his Wonderbread loaf of a personality and ceases to be an exciting person with creativity and dreams.

Am I wrong to think like this? Am I just a jealous single bitch? Am I just as equally boring for hanging out with these boring people?

Yeah, it’s all about you, isn’t it?

Your roommate’s boyfriend isn’t boring. You’re just bored by your roommate’s boyfriend. See the difference? Of course you don’t, because you’re the center of the whole damn universe.

After a year and a half, what you should have finally realized is that you’re an incredibly self-centered girl who gets annoyed when the people in your life stop playing whatever role it is that you’ve assigned to them.

You don’t seem to care how your roommate actually feels. You just care that she continues playing the role of the “exciting person with creativity and dreams.” Whose dreams are we talking about, anyway? I’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess yours, because it sounds like your roommate is pretty darned happy in her relationship with a perfectly nice, perfectly attractive, perfectly successful functioning adult.

Take a step back and ask yourself, why would a perfectly nice, perfectly attractive, perfectly successful functioning adult have nothing terribly interesting to say to you? Is it because he’s boring? Is it because you’re boring?

Nope and nope. Shocking as this may seem, he has nothing terribly interesting to say to you because he doesn’t exist to hold your interest. Sorry, babe. He’s not there for your entertainment. Neither is your roommate.

I know your type. You don’t feed off of chaos and drama. You’re not an evil person, but still, you quietly exist as an emotional singularity around which everyone else in your world revolves.

Unfortunately, your roommate’s boyfriend doesn’t love you or hate you. He does nothing to p*** you off or make you laugh. It’s not that he’s boring. It’s that he’s in your world and yet totally indifferent to you.

That’s the real reason he bugs you.

Have a question? Ask me anything …

(Source: thedaily.com)